Widowing With RDKarenB

Well, drats. On Thursday I had a lumpectomy to remove a very small “invasive ductal carcinoma” tumor and a couple of lymph nodes. The wonderful Dr. Z called me on Saturday with the pathology reports. The things he extracted were free of any other cancer cells. Yippy!!! One and done!!! BUT . . . Apparently…

Most of the time I am a person who just keeps going. I am a person who takes everything in stride – the good, the bad, the ugly. So when I am confronted with something that makes me not want to keep going, I am at first frustrated and want to scream “Get out of…

A year ago I tried starting this blog. It was frustrating from a technological standpoint. I have taken a stab here and there of getting it to function for me and then given up. (You can tell by my last post being in February, but I have made tries since then!) Part of me wonders…

I didn’t expect to be so overwhelmed by the sweetness of memories expressed during yesterday’a Super Bowl game. I didn’t know how many others engaged with Barry on this particular day as he offered commentary on the game and mostly the commercials. I was truly touched that so many expressed their sorrow at his being…

I realized (again) this morning that I’m not alone in my grief. Other people are currently grieving Barry too. Kirstyn, Wes, the Wyalusing Pres congregation, the community. We’re in this together and yet we are alone. We all grieve differently. We all comfort differently too. I’m coming to believe that we comfort others in the…

I really love the anticipation of a season change. I get excited about the solstice times of year. I think maybe because we once hiked from Scotland to England following St. Cuthbert’s Way and arrived at a spot early one morning where the solstice had been observed by a bunch of “hippies”. Knowing that we…

First? You get paralyzed and do nothing. Example A: This blog. It still ain’t right. But I got rid of “example page” so that’s something. Right? In the meantime I’ve had all these first time experiences and thoughts that I’ve wanted to share, but how with an imperfect blog site?? Did I mention earlier that…

How was our first Christmas without Barry? Meh. No strong emotions. No crying at the opening of gifts or at the table. The only emotions were from Barry’s dear mother and those were invoked by a very mushy note I included in her gift. There were feelings as I drove to church on Christmas Eve.…

I’m ready for this! Gifts are wrapped. Service of worship is prepared and I’m excited to lead it! Wes is coming home this afternoon and Kirstyn will be home tomorrow. How will it all be? Who knows. I have no preconceived notions of how this Christmas will feel and I’m okay with that. I’m sure…